Putting the Aggressive in Passive-Aggressive

Allow me to share with you this excerpt from our neighborhood group newsletter:

Dear Residents: For numerous years past, the same small group of volunteers has rallied the troops to make —‘s very popular parade and picnic happen. The children who enjoyed the event while growing up are now grown, and these volunteers are tired. Numerous requests have been sent out for the past three years for new blood, but none has materialized. So, this year —- will not in any way be associated with a July 4th celebration.

What this means to you is that there will be no official parade, no parade permit, no police escort, no event insurance in case someone is hurt, no park reservations; and no food, drink, vendors, shade structures, politicians, or entertainment at the park.

I sincerely hope all of you enjoy your July 4th, wherever you may be, and that the —- event is revived in the future. Even if it isn’t, though, so many enjoyed the event for so many years that the memory will live on for a long time. Thank all of you volunteers so very much for keeping the event going as long as you did. You deserve a big round of applause.

Other titles I considered using for this post:

  • Why I’m not a joiner
  • And yet, we will probably make it to July 5th just fine
  • Maybe if the minister across the street (our “area coordinator” for the neighborhood group) would stop talking smack about our yard behind our backs, I would give a damn.

One thought on “Putting the Aggressive in Passive-Aggressive

  1. Angelina

    I love the alternative titles. I’ve got to say, after reading that excerpt, I am certainly not going to volunteer to keep your parade going.

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