How NOT to behave when you rear-end my parked car

Since we are apparently magnetic to people who are not paying attention while driving, I offer this guide for anyone ELSE who may end up trying to park their pickup or SUV in the back of my Honda Fit.

Once your vehicle has impacted mine, please do NOT:

1. Complain about the damage to your own car.

2. Complain about us calling the cops for instructions on how to proceed, even if you “have insurance” and “that’s just going to make it take longer.”

3. Claim that your insurance and driver’s license have an out of town address because you “just moved here” and you’re “staying with a friend,” so you don’t have a local address where you “get mail or anything”… especially when you have a cell phone with your “new” city’s area code.

At least this time the big vehicle that hit us didn’t take out the glass in the hatchback door… unlike last time: