Category Archives: Conversations

Maybe I need to be in bed too?

Me: Now he’s playing an accordion in his room [instead of going to sleep]! C-Man: A xylophone, but yes. Me: That’s what I meant. I think someone wears me out… but at least we have similar taste in accessories. And apparently he holds still for pictures better than I do!

The truth comes out

Me: It’s so interesting to me that you always want breakfast right away when you get up, these days. Boy Detective: What do you mean? Me: Remember how you never used to be hungry first thing in the morning? It took you quite a while to be ready for breakfast. So you’d go off and build Legos or whatever? Boy… Read more »

And he just sounded so reasonable…

Boy Detective: I have three moss toads in my room. Me: Why do you have toads in your room? Boy Detective: So I can do things with them. Me: Like what? Boy Detective: Anything really. Well, anything that requires a toad. Me: That’s why I’m asking, because I can’t think of what you would DO with a toad. Be specific…. Read more »

That first Monday of summer vacation can be confusing

C-Man: So how was your day, little guy? Boy Detective: At school, or at jiu jitsu? (parents exchange looks) Me: Well I’d really like to hear about your day at school. Boy Detective: It was good. Me: The other kids behaved themselves, the teachers were nice? Boy Detective: Yeah. (pause) (confused expression) HEY, YOU TRICKED ME!

The thrill of victory!

Boy Detective has started practicing jiu jitsu three days a week, so Amazon keeps dropping off books about it. C-Man: I think that guy needs more patches on his gi. Me: Maybe he’s so excited because he just found out he’s getting another one.

Oh sure, deflect my ire with science jokes

Me: And can someone get these dice off my bedside table that have been sitting there for weeks for reasons which escape me? C-Man: That would be due to gravity, dear. (pause) Me: I accept that explanation. Or it could have something to do with this person…

Prelude to a campout

Scene 1 C-Man: Is there any reason why I should look for a tent that sleeps more than two people? Me: No. Scene 2 Me: How was testing out setting up the tent? Boy Detective: Great! I got to hit a lot of stuff with a hammer! Me: Wonderful. But did the tent actually work? That’s kind of important. Boy… Read more »

I’m not sure I can win this one

C-Man: Are you secretly a vigilante? Me: I don’t have time for that. C-Man: Is there a secret compartment in the basement I should know about? Me: Do we have a basement? C-Man: That’s a very good act you’re putting on. Me: Um…? C-Man: And it’s exactly what I’d expect you to say if you were secretly a vigilante. The… Read more »

Maybe letting him watch Star Wars was a mistake?

Boy Detective: Can you do a better job next time sending me with that note? Me: Oh man, I totally forgot, didn’t I? Boy Detective: Yeah but I know you can do it. Me: You have a lot of faith in me. I’ll try. Boy Detective (very seriously): Do or do not, Mom. There is no try.

Why I Pick the Music We Listen to in the Car, Exhibit D

And it did come to pass that because of events at a certain elementary school, the inhabitants of Castle K did watch the video for “What Does the Fox Say?” approximately 5.2 million internet years after everyone else on the internet had already seen it and gotten bored with it… C-Man: We need that! Me: You want me to buy… Read more »