I Am A Rock

   October 20, 2003    Comments Off on I Am A Rock

I have learned much from living alone for the past five months. I create less trash than I thought. Being in a vegetarian-only space is more important to my sense of well-being than I knew. I like hitting snooze several times on the radio-alarm clock and waking up slowly in the morning. I hate being the only one who ever… Read more »

My Hypochondria (Episode 2,173)

   October 10, 2003    Comments Off on My Hypochondria (Episode 2,173)

Isn’t there some kind of disease that makes both of your arms so tired that you think they are going to fall off? Because I have it.

I Prefer My Government Like Saran Wrap With Taxing Authority, Thank You

   October 9, 2003    Comments Off on I Prefer My Government Like Saran Wrap With Taxing Authority, Thank You

I am a Big Government person. With this many people in North America, or even in Texas, it just makes sense to me that we should fund a dedicated group to do some problem-solving on issues that affect everybody. Otherwise the only way to, say, build a hospital is to get everyone to pitch in on the evenings and weekends… Read more »

Delaware Ruins Everything

   October 9, 2003    Comments Off on Delaware Ruins Everything

On Route #3 Bus, Burnet/Manchaca, southbound, morning, re: admission to the University of Texas at Austin: Girl: I just need to be a foreign student and then I’ll get in. Don’t we have a quota on foreign students or something? Boy: Ummm…. no, I don’t think so. Girl: Or people from Delaware or something?

Canine Reprogramming

   October 8, 2003    1 Comment on Canine Reprogramming

If anyone knows a humane method for convincing a dog that big fat juicy snails are Not Interesting, please drop me a line. I don’t mind her smelling them, and if she licks one I can always brush her teeth, but I would hate for her to eat one. It’s just too French. I mean Freedom.

Science Meets Fashion

   October 6, 2003    Comments Off on Science Meets Fashion

It’s unfortunate that there’s no article, but The Toque’s headline “Queer Eye For Bill Nye The Science Guy” was enough to make my day.

My Funeral (which is hopefully far away, but about which I have opinions)

   October 5, 2003    Comments Off on My Funeral (which is hopefully far away, but about which I have opinions)

For the record, I’d very much like “Come On Up to the House” by Tom Waits to be the music – the actual recording, not some subdued organist’s rendition. It’s not a hymn, so no one has to sing along, especially because I think asking my mother to sing the line “Come down off the cross, we can use the… Read more »

I’m In Love

   October 3, 2003    1 Comment on I’m In Love

I know, I said I would be single for a while. But how can I resist anyone who engages in Extreme Ironing? Surely there will be a personal ads section on this site soon…